LAST UPDATED: September 13th, 2024
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After a lifetime of ‘normal’- you know the drill: alarm clocks, long commutes, bosses, homework… All that stuff we’re told is the reason for waking up each day- we decided to throw in the towel on that lifestyle in 2014. Seth was nearly 12, and I was nearing 28 ( which is scary close to 30, as you may know!). After years of being ‘too busy’ and largely unhappy, we had finally had enough. So after countless hours of discussion, soul searching, research, questioning, debating and second (and third) guessing, we registered with a homeschool board, and began the process of ‘deschooling’. Now, almost 2 years after that initial thought process, we are living the life we’ve both dreamed of!
Let’s back up a bit…
I grew up in a small city near Edmonton, AB. A city in which, as a teen, you either had to play hockey or do drugs to ‘fit in’ as a teen. I chose the latter. Not that it was a choice so much as a slippery slide; one that you’re standing at the top of, and you take a small step forward and suddenly, before you know it, you’re on your ass halfway down realizing you really hate slides to begin with.
And you definitely don’t get to the top of that slide on your own. The ladder to my slide was built with the teasing and abuse from my fellow small-city classmates. We all know bullying has been waving its giant pink flag for years, and it certainly wasn’t any less prominent 20 years ago.
Then, thanks to my fall down that slide, and the choices that came with it, I ended up pregnant at 15. Shortly after my 16 birthday my son was born. That’s a long complicated story in itself, so we really don’t need to go too deep into it! His dad is a great man, and is still involved in his life, though we broke up shortly before his third birthday.
So, needless to say, 15 years later when I was watching my son coming close to being faced with this same fork in the road, I knew the pattern had to be broken, and FAST.
Watching him go through many of the same troubles I had faced, and in the same schools, was heartbreaking. Here I was, charged with helping this child grow into a self aware, well adjusted and happy teen, and I wasn’t yet any of those things myself. I couldn’t even fathom how that was possible!
Enter: Unschooling
I spent most of Seth’s life working and going to school, in order to be able to pay our bills. This left him moving around quite a bit, splitting time between me (when I wasn’t working), his dad, and 2 sets of grandparents. He grew up thinking he had 4 homes, and 4 bedrooms, having to clarify which home he was referring to in every conversation. I hardly saw him, often going days without. But, I had no other option, being the single parent that I was. (not that I was parenting alone, but at the end of the day, financially and emotionally, I had to be my own support system)